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recurring bad feeling

  1. apontedavid
    Member

    I don't know why this happens but there are days that I feel great but I get this one bad feeling coming around all the time.

    It's like just one really bad day where nothing happens to me really but I feel hated, stupid, avoided and commercial in the sense that I fall into a certain character of people. On this day I could interpret almost anything and feel the lowest of the low. I feel that they talk to me a certain way because of my appearance and because my facial gestures appear to be, well dumb. I combat this feeling towards people with a serious closed one line comments. It doesn't feel like Im being me when this happens.

    Everything else is great for the most part. People are liking my blog and have always liked my film work. I have good friends and a great family...

    But on these type of bad days I feel like my mind takes a big hit like if I reset and I have to prove myself all over again. It's not like a bad week or month its just one day. I find myself trying to sleep it off all day when this happens :/

  2. bats0711
    Member

    Well what I've learned is to remind myself that feelings aren't facts but also it is okay to feel.
    Hell everyone needs a day occassionally to sleep life off. We have to remind ourselves that you know, it is okay to have a bad day every once and awhile.

  3. appsterberry
    Member

    this sounds 100% characteristic (of feelings) of depression.
    not saying you are depressed, just, that's basically the day in the life of,,

  4. apontedavid
    Member

    maybe your right a lot has happened in the past 2 years. I wrote this to talk to you guys and get this off my chest. Sometime I think its just because I'm me.

  5. bats0711
    Member

    Well shoot, I'm assuming the past 2 years hasn't been a picnic eh? Trust me when I say I understand COMPLETELY. and you know we get tired especially when life is stressful or anxiety ridden, and even when it's happy go lucky. You know it could just be your body, mind and soul saying I need a break just for today. I do have to say that I don't hold any sort of medical license so I can't diagnose you with anything BUT I can say I'm here, if you need to get it off your chest. If at any moment you feel that it's becoming a serious issue, you should seek doctors advice. Hang in there, I have a feeling that you are going to be okay.

  6. dingledodie
    Member

    What you're experiencing is called Dissociation (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dissociation). You most likely experienced some sort of childhood trauma, whether it be sexual, physical, or verbal abuse, or perhaps even child-on-child sexual abuse. It may also have been as usual as seeing a loved one die or experiencing a completely mortifying and/or embarrassing moment (for example, if you were caught having sex or doing drugs by a loved one or otherwise).

    Dissociation can also stem from people with PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ptsd). Maybe you've been in active combat and/or been hit a lot as a child.

    Whatever the case, what you are trying to do is either take on a separate personality or remove yourself from your personality completely, whether you are consciously aware of your fear of abandonment, abuse, and/or embarrassment.

    I suggest you go see a counselor and dig deeper if I have not completely diagnosed you.

  7. dingledodie
    Member

    By the way, you could also be depressed (maybe from a chemical imbalance in the brain). This is very normal. If you think this is the case, I suggest you go see a therapist and then someone who can prescribe you antidepressant drugs. Good luck.

  8. apontedavid
    Member

    thanks I started to read about the Dissociation I've never heard about it. Maybe a therapist is a good idea i need this to be put into some perspective. you know what i just thought about? a blog therapist! lol. I would definitely post there

  9. dingledodie
    Member

    Good idea. :D

    And, just so you know, I'm always available to talk to. I know a lot of stuff about therapy, so if you want, hit me up. My email address is here (I won't post it on this forum to knock out any trolls...): http://wearepositive.wordpress.com/about-the-author/?preview=1&template=pub/treba&stylesheet=pub/treba

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