Hello,
When I look here:
http://who.is/domain-history/besecureselfdefense.com
it looks like you were previously the registrant for the domain name Besecureselfdefense.com, but that the registrant information was changed. However, we can't tell when it was changed, and the new registrant's name and email address is hidden by a "privacy" option. Did you change it, possibly?
Since the domain was registered elsewhere and not through WordPress.com I don't have any more information as to what happened or how it happened. For the site to point to your WordPress.com site, you will need to change the Nameservers for the domain back to
NS1.WORDPRESS.COM
NS2.WORDPRESS.COM
NS3.WORDPRESS.COM
You will need to contact Coolhandle support here (they are the domain name registrar in your case):
http://www.coolhandle.com/support/
In the meanwhile, I have changed the "primary domain" back to being bwgoatspeak.wordpress.com so that the site is accessible again. You can access the dashboard for the site here:
https://bwgoatspeak.wordpress.com/wp-admin/
In case you weren't the one who changed the registrant information, I'd suggest changing all of your passwords (including your WordPress.com password) and checking your computer for viruses or spyware.
Please let me know if I can be of any additional assistance.